What We Might Do
by ThyLaSlain
Summary: [SASUXNARU] What we might do. When we're all alone. There's just you. And there's just me. And the promise of nothing in between.
1. Chapter 1

**Overall rating: **M

**Summary:** What we might do. When we're all alone. There's just you. And there's just me. And the promise of nothing in between.

**SPOILERS:** None  
**CHAPTER WARNINGS: **pre-slash.  
**Pairing:** Uchiha Sasuke x Uzumaki Naruto  
**Chapter Rating:** T  
_**Disclaimer:** Naruto and all related characters © Masashi Kishimoto -- i.e. They are not mine._

**Author's Note: **Sasuke has come back from Oro-idiot (sorry to fans of said baka...hehehe...I suppose he has some merits?) and this is a few years AFTER Sasuke's return, so naruto and him are cool now. this is a sort of char-study and doesn't have too much of a complicated plot. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy!

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**i.**

It was the quiet crunching of stones and ground beneath feet that alerted Sasuke of Naruto's presence. There was a silent, misty haze surrounding the blond just then. But Sasuke did not move away from the tree he stood against. From where he stood, he could not see nor be seen by Naruto and he felt that that was a good thing.

Naruto continued to walk and soon he would be besides Sasuke, but only for a moment, before he walked by and his back would be all Sasuke saw. The moment passed and Naruto didn't pause, didn't acknowledge the other.

The breath Sasuke let out spread out easily in the air in front of him and he leaned his head back, glancing at the leaves and branches hanging above him before focusing past them; out at the sky, its shade a blue so dark it was almost black. Almost.

Stars dotted the stained sky. There were no clouds, in the little expanse of sky that the branches framed for him.

Bringing his eyes down from the dark blue, his eyes fell on another source of the color. Though Naruto's eyes seemed a shade darker than the sky.

The crunching of earth beneath Naruto's feet had gone silent. They looked at each other now, intently. They did not back down. One didn't accept defeat. The other couldn't.

For the longest of time, they didn't stop looking. Looking and looking and looking. Nothing was allowed to pass between them. Neither was willing to give information up. Neither was allowed to let anything slip.

But it did anyway. Small trickling streams of thought escaped. Because they understood each other too well.

In the back of his mind, Sasuke could only think and wonder why Naruto's face seemed so very _familiar_ just then. So _known_.

As if a story Sasuke knew too well was playing behind the darkened blue eyes.

He was sure, that he had not reached out for Naruto. But he must have, he rationalized, because suddenly he had met Naruto midway and support was given and took.

Maybe because both were tired of looking and staring – and _seeing_ – their lips met.

Neither melted. And in the unrelenting connection they made, neither struggled for power or dominance. Neither submitted. Sasuke could feel Naruto's blond eyelashes flutter against his cheek. He knew Naruto's eyes were as tightly shut as his.

The kiss was not wet. It was cold and dry and when they pulled away, there was a moment where they could savor privacy. A moment where they were shut off from each other, and they were just themselves. But the moment was gone when both opened their eyes, and met each other's gazes.

They could see too much in each other's eyes.

Naruto's breathing was shallow and Sasuke felt his knuckles complain. He was gripping Naruto's arms too tightly still and the large calloused hands against Sasuke's chest still pulled at him with an equal fervor.

Slowly, their grips eased, but their heads were still cocked at different angles, their lips still centimeters apart.

The grip on his clothes fell away and Sasuke noted dully that Naruto's touch didn't add any warmth to him. He seemed to have taken some away.

Their kiss was not an offer of comfort. It was an attempt to avoid comforting each other at all costs. A fumbling attempt to silence each other's minds and questions.

Sasuke knew now, with a shudder, why Naruto seemed too familiar just then. Of course, he had known Naruto for years now. But right at that moment, he _knew_ Naruto. He knew him because he understood him. Knew him, because he had once felt the same way.

They were farther apart now. The black Naruto wore made him look older. Sasuke reasoned that this must be why those blue eyes were so very _dark_ tonight. Naruto turned away. He no longer allowed Sasuke to _see_, and again, the crunch of gravel beneath feet could be heard.

He watched Naruto walk away. The kiss all but forgotten in the blonde's mind. Or pushed back. Back, back, back into the corners. Sasuke's knuckles still ached from when he gripped tightly on to him.

He did not move. He couldn't stop watching Naruto walk away.

The kiss lingered on, on Sasuke's lips. The kiss both had forced on each other for different reasons. Sasuke had wanted it. Naruto had needed it.

Naruto had needed it to keep his eyes closed. To keep his eyes closed to the cenotaph that stood behind Sasuke. Sasuke turned his head a fraction and he could see, right at the corner of his eye, the blue monument.

It was too far to read the inscriptions. But Sasuke didn't need to read it. He knew. Among the names chiseled into the new blue stone, was Umino Iruka's.

Even in the fierce moonlight, the stone remained dull. A wind blew and sighed in Sasuke's ears.

And then the wind was gone and all was silent. And he was alone again.

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_to be continued_  



	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Rating: M **for violence

**To my Reviewers:  
Shizuka Ketsurui, lunabasketcase: **Thank you. :) I'm glad you're enjoying it so far.  
**Agent0003: **Lol. I don't really use big words, so my spelling is _generally_ alright.  
**Love Squared:** Iruka has died at war. Hope that clears stuff up for you.  
**mirai3k: **lol. I wonder how much good could possibly come out of his death…but let's see alright? Lol  
**diamond-princess2006: **:) They may not be too in-character since this is a character study for the most part, taking into consideration how Naruto and Sasuke may change as they grow older.   
**Azamiko: **lol. I love fluff though. :D  
**hecate-19: **Sasuke's not with Oro-moron anymore, this is after Sasuke has come back, and I have taken into account changes in their relationship and chemistry, which I hope to explore farther later on…:)

**Author's Note: **Sasuke has come back from Oro-idiot (sorry to fans of said baka...hehehe...I suppose he has some merits?) and this is a few years AFTER Sasuke's return, so naruto and him are cool now. this is a sort of char-study and doesn't have too much of a complicated plot. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy!

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**ii.**

The next morning was a perfect dance of lies. But this was the way it was. As a ninja, you were not given _time_ to recover.

Sasuke entered the mission's room just as Naruto did. Kakashi was already there, standing patiently in line to receive their assignment. The one exposed blue eye passive and when his two ex-students and current team mates walked in, he turned around and the eye was then an inverted u; a smile forming beneath the man's mask.

They stepped up to join Kakashi. And the little conversation had between Kakashi and Naruto followed the rhythm perfectly. They laughed, teased and were bored. They were the perfect dancing partners for each other. But the music was muted as they stepped closer to the table and both men fell quiet.

Kakashi's hands were in his pocket as he stood in front of the table, the Chuunin there explaining the mission. A retrieval of scrolls; S-class nins involved; trifling really.

There was a pause when the Chuunin handed Kakashi the scroll containing the information he had just stated and more. Kakashi just stood, looking at the Chuunin, who looked at Kakashi as if wondering what it was he was doing wrong.

Sasuke knew of course.

The Chuunin wasn't Iruka.

As Kakashi pulled out a hand from his pocket to take the scroll – his movements slow and languid and screamed of tired boredom – Sasuke brushed his fingers against Naruto's. Sasuke could remember the feeling of dry, chapped skin against his lips. He brushed his thumb against Naruto's index finger. He felt the hand twitch. Naruto's rough fingers pulled gently at Sasuke's fingers and stroked what palm he could reach through the gloves Sasuke was wearing. For the briefest of moments, their fingers were entangled and then they both pulled away. If Sasuke had been anyone else, he would have glanced over at Naruto, aching to see the blonde's face and reaction to him.

He didn't need to. The face would be blank.

After all, it was Naruto who knew this dance the best of all.

---

"How long before we reach there?" Naruto called out from somewhere behind Sasuke.

Sasuke glanced up ahead at Kakashi.

"Two days." Kakashi replied.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sasuke saw Naruto nod. After that there was no more talking, the sound of wind rushing over their ears was the only thing that saved them all from malignant silence.

Thirty minutes of traveling lead them to the first fight of that mission. It had hardly seemed fair; the three of them against two nins from an unknown village. So Kakashi fell back and let Sasuke and Naruto handle it.

Sasuke quickly made assessments of both ninjas. They were deft and quick in their movements. Not nins to be meddled with but still, hardly any challenge at all. He decided to keep his Sharingan eyes to himself.

With a perfect blend of Ninjutsu and Taijutsu, Sasuke proved why he was considered the genius of his year in the academy. With every attack made towards him, he had the perfect counter-attack. Soon enough, his counter-attacks were being blocked and he smirked to himself.

The Nin pulled back from Sasuke and quickly made it clear that his specialty was long-range attacks. Shuriken cut their way through the air at him, lethal if Sasuke had been less competent than he was. Sasuke deftly dodged each and every single one and retaliated with a barrage of his own.

Behind him Naruto was being bombarded by fire-based jutsus and he could feel the heat of the fire ball that Naruto had just dodged swiftly. Returning attention to his own assailant, he saw that the nin was now performing hand seals. The swift jutsus performed were familiar to Sasuke who recognized the slightly altered earth-based jutsus. He felt the ground beneath him ripple and move, cracking and shooting up stalagmites of sharp rock. Using the momentum of the rising rock, he propelled his entire body backwards; barely missing a fire ball formed by Naruto's opponent.

He had felt the heat and it had seemed to dry him out as well as making the earth beneath the hand he had landed on burning hot to the touch. He ignored the pain and decided he was weary of fighting. He flipped and was on his feet, quickly turning to his attacker and ran, headlong towards him, bouncing off the towers of rock that had formed between them. When he was within a good range, he swiftly attacked with shuriken. The shuriken met their target and the familiar Poof! and smoke and the appearance of a log seconds later announced that Sasuke's opponent had just performed a kawarimi. He smirked. He looked around quickly, taking in everything. Naruto was performing a new rendan. His fight would be over soon too.

Sasuke waited a second more and felt the expected grasp around his ankle and looking down he saw his attacker propelling up from the ground, shuriken in his free hand, aimed straight for Sasuke's head. Sasuke merely grabbed the arm that was rising up towards him and turning his body; pivoting on the foot whose ankle was trapped, he pulled the arm that held the shuriken swiftly backwards in a jerking motion, using the momentum of his attacker's body to aid him in his movements. The attacker cried out in pain and Sasuke was sure then that he had pulled the arm out of its socket. Without missing a beat, he shoved the shuriken the nin was holding straight into the nin's back. The hand around his ankle disappeared and he was now behind a buckling ninja. Placing his hands on both of the nin's shoulders, he catapulted himself up and over the nin, pulling out a shuriken from its holster midair and was facing him in a fraction of a second. There was no hesitation in Sasuke as he drove the shuriken straight through the nin's throat.

The dark eyes rolled back into the nin's head and he was dead. Glancing over to Naruto, Naruto was making his way to Kakashi. His gaze drifted over to Naruto's opponent. The body was propped up against a tree and by the odd angle the head was in, Sasuke knew that the neck was broken.

He took his time walking over to where Naruto and Kakashi stood waiting for him. Kakashi gave him a nod showing some form of approval. Sasuke shifted slightly. The fight today felt strange although nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. Looking over at Naruto, there was blood at the corner of his mouth. Sasuke looked away, fighting the urge to brush the blood away with the pad of his thumb.

---

They were lucky to come across an inn and although Naruto complained loudly that he wanted to keep going; that he wasn't tired and he wanted to get the mission over with, in the end, Kakashi's authority ruled him over.

The mats on the floor of their room were arranged neatly side by side with thick blankets folded neatly at the foot of them. Each mat had its own hard rectangle of pillow and one by one the men walked in, claiming a space for himself. Sasuke chose the place farthest from the door; closest to the window.

Naruto was between Kakashi and him. Like always, Sasuke kneeled at the foot of his mat removing articles of clothing that he did not need as well as weapons that would bother him in his sleep. He lay them neatly next to his pillow. He could feel Naruto watching him from where he lay on his own mat. Naruto just shoved clothing and weapons off and collapsed wherever he could. Besides Naruto, Kakashi was looking thoughtfully at the sliding door.

Turning to Sasuke, Kakashi announced that he was going. Sasuke merely nodded. He knew that Kakashi would be heading to the bar for sake. Naruto did not reply. After a moment, he crawled and settled gracefully onto his mat, pulling the blanket over himself. He let a sigh escape his lips and he closed his eyes, allowing himself to fall asleep.

A few hours later, Sasuke awoke and listened intently to the sounds around him. He listened for Naruto's quiet snoring and was not surprised when he didn't hear them.

"Kakashi's not back yet." Naruto whispered in the dark.

Sasuke turned his head and looked at Naruto's profile. There was emptiness in the blue eyes that stared up at the ceiling, and then turned to stare at him.

Maybe it was inevitable that his hand slid out from underneath his blanket and then slid beneath Naruto's, searching for a hand; breaching the twelve inches that separated them. He found his fingers brushing Naruto's bare side and then he made contact with Naruto's elbow. Fingers traveled easily down a forearm and made contact with knuckles and then fingers.

Before this, it had always been Naruto who initiated touches. Naruto often draped an arm around Sasuke's shoulders and pressed hands against Sasuke's back and side as they walked side by side in Konohagakure. The touches were objective and intimate all at once. During battles in which they fought side by side, Naruto had always taken the time to pause and touch Sasuke faintly on his bare elbow. If Sasuke was otherwise engaged, Naruto would go back to fighting and reach out to Sasuke the moment he was free. Sasuke barely noticed the light brushes against his skin as he clashed with enemies. Yet on some level, perhaps he did because on missions without Naruto, he often felt there was something missing from his fights.

It had taken Sasuke a while to realize that this was how Naruto grounded himself. How Naruto reassured himself that Sasuke was still with him. The fleeting contact of fingers-to-elbow was some way of proving to Naruto that no, Sasuke had not run off – he was still there. The fact that Sasuke let him proved to Naruto that they were on good terms. And in a way the contact grounded Sasuke too.

They were reassurances that he was not alone provided by fleeting gentle coldness or flushed heat against his own skin. That contact had been missing from the fight today. Naruto had not gone near him even once.

Naruto was still watching and as Sasuke's hand came into contact with his fingers, sliding gently between them with his own, Naruto did not even blink or acknowledge the touch. Sasuke pulled their hands out from underneath the blanket and in the moonlight he saw Naruto's hand, lying with its palm facing up.

He didn't know what he was trying to provide, or trying to take, but after a moment, he had propped his body up with an elbow and reached over to trail fingers on the exposed palm.

"What are you doing?"

"Shh."

Sasuke whispered gently as he sat up some more, regarding the warm palm beneath his fingers.

"I don't want your pity."

"I know."

He grasped the hand and brought it up to his lips kissing the delicate skin on the wrists.

"You don't look at me when you do that."

"I never did."

Sasuke shifted closer to Naruto, lips pressed against wrist. His tongue slipped between his lips and tasted the skin there. He sucked lightly as if taking what life and feeling he could through the translucent skin. Then he let the hand drop and it did, where it fell on his lap and then slid to the floor.

"I don't want your pity."

"I'm not giving any."

"Then what's this?" Naruto wrist nudged Sasuke's knee.

"An apology."

Naruto turned his head to stare up at the ceiling. Sasuke bent over to block the blonde's view.

"Accept it, Naruto."

The blonde didn't say anything but he accepted the kiss that was given to him. Sasuke did not know where his kisses were coming from. But they appeared. And he gave them away. Kissing was new. They had kissed for the first time the night before. Perhaps because it seemed natural then, Sasuke was doing it again now.

It wasn't cool and dry this time. It was hotter. But just as distant. Naruto's mouth didn't move beneath his own and the moment Sasuke pulled away, Naruto rolled over, his back to Sasuke's side of the room.

Sasuke lay back down but couldn't get back to sleep.

Kakashi came back two hours before dawn and the stink of alcohol and blood hung in the air. Sasuke did not mention it the next morning and if Naruto had noticed, neither did he.

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_to be continued..._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Rating: T**

**To my Reviewers:  
Daitai Otonashii Ookami, Pink Jello, Jarakuheart, chi no hana, mirai3k:** Thank you. :)   
**Azamiko: **I'm glad you're enjoying it so far. Thanks so much for the lovely review. :)   
**A. Minamino:** Your wish is my command. No, Iruka isn't very often killed, is he?  
**Aya Kurayami:** lol. It seems I _live_ to write Angst.  
**Seph Lorraine:** Thank you very much. :) I'm glad that it seems that I have accomplished what I set out to do n this particular fic…I hope I don't disappoint?

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iii.**

_The last thing Sasuke saw before collapsing was Kakashi on the far end of the battle field, at the edge of the canyon, body hunched over with palms pressed against the ground, his one sharingan eye swirling dizzily and the other blue one staring glassily out over the cliff. Sasuke wondered vaguely what Kakashi was looking down at. Then there was the relief of darkness and the air that was tainted with screams evaporated around his ears._

_When he next woke up Sakura was bent over him, hands at his chest; a green glow emanating from them. When she saw that he had come back to consciousness, she gave a sniff and wiped the steadily falling tears off of her face with a shoulder, her hands still placed on his chest. He tried to sit up and the hands fell away. A quick hug and Sakura was on to the next shinobi._

_Sasuke sat up and watched as medical-nins scoured the field, reviving Nins left right and centre. His head hurt but he found himself ignoring the throbbing pain as his eyes drifted steadily over the battle field. It was a moment before he spotted Naruto, standing quietly besides Shikamaru. Their heads were bent towards each other as they talked, Naruto's eyes darting around the field, the blue eyes filled with concern and anxiety._

_It was a moment before their eyes met and Naruto whispered something quickly to Shikamaru before making his way towards Sasuke. In a moment Naruto was crouching besides him. They didn't say a word to each other but simply stared out around them looking for familiar faces._

_Hinata. Neji bent over her. Hanabi off to the side, hands tugging impatiently at her hair._

_Ino, Chouji. Kiba trapped underneath the weight of a delighted Akamaru._

_Hagane Kotetsu and Kamizuki Izumo were off to one side, Izumo's shouted words couldn't be understood from where they sat but Sasuke heard the anxiety and relief that laced the angry words._

_Sasuke turned to look at Naruto whose eyes were fixed on Namiashi Raido and Shirinaui Genma. Several medical Nins surrounded the Genma, his chest heaving as Raido shouted angry demands down at him. Sasuke could just hear them._

"_Pull through! Pull through! Don't you dare fucking die on me! Don't you dare!"_

_Sasuke looked away and so did Naruto. They stared at the ground that lay between them and only looked up when they heard the hard sobbing and the "You bastard, you bastard. You scared me. You scared me."_

"_Sasuke." Naruto whispered. Sasuke could feel warm fingers brushing against his own. "Sasuke, look."_

_And he did. There was Tenten who didn't wake up. A Lee who was still unconscious. Shizune lying on her side, head twisted oddly to one side._

_Sasuke turned to look at Naruto and knew then why Naruto would become Hokage. Pain filled the blue eyes, pain that was both familiar and completely alien to Sasuke. Pain for everyone but himself. He seemed to share people's grieving. Seemed to want to soak it up like a sponge. Seemed to want to protect everyone, everyone and anyone, no matter what. The familiarity of loving and losing family stained the blue iris. Sasuke looked away._

"_There's Kakashi." Naruto whispered, squinting and looking out to their senpai, silver hair glinting in the dull dusty moonlight._

_Sasuke saw that Kakashi was where he had last seen him, still staring down into the canyon. They got up and made their way towards him._

"_There were more than we thought." Naruto whispered, struggling to keep his voice calm._

_Sasuke merely nodded._

"_The first few teams were almost killed off instantly. It's a good thing we were prepared." Naruto continued. "Mine should have gone first."_

_Sasuke smirked. His team had been the ones at the forefront. Naruto had demanded the spot for his team from the Hokage. She flat out refused, thrusting him into a team headed by Kakashi. What made it worse was Iruka was on the same team and Naruto complained he wouldn't even be able to scratch his ass without his two self-appointed guardians – or at least Iruka was – hovering in the background worrying over him._

_Naruto's gaze moved over to Sasuke. "I saw you."_

_Sasuke started, eyes meeting Naruto's. "You're getting a bit too cocky, _Uchiha_." Naruto mocked, a small smile dancing on his face. It went unsaid. _Thank God you're alive. _"Heh. You're still a klutz as always." _You too. Oh God you too.

_Naruto's smile widened. They were getting closer to Kakashi; Sakura was already there. She put an arm on her sensei's shoulder and talked to him, asking him questions and inspecting his injuries. Still, Kakashi did not move._

_Sasuke frowned and he watched Sakura's gaze move from their senpai down into the canyon Kakashi seemed so interested in. Reaching the edge where Sakura and Kakashi crouched, Sasuke turned his attention to Kakashi; curious. Naruto smiled broadly at Sakura who didn't respond and just turned her gaze back down into the canyon._

_The smile was still there when Sakura suddenly pushed herself backwards._

"_Oh God. Oh God. Oh God."_

_The kunoichi seemed to be chanting. She scrambled away from the edge before pulling at Kakashi, pulling and pulling him back, tears streaming down from her green eyes. Kakashi was pulled back easily and the shinobi lay on his back, his one blue eye glassy with unshed tears and sharingan eye swirling and swirling and swirling. It stared up into the sky, as if ready to copy the movements of the stars. Sasuke turned away and gazed at Naruto, who looked just as confused as he was._

_Sasuke's eyes never left Naruto's face even as Naruto looked past Sasuke down into the canyon. A ghost of a smile still lingered on his face._

"_Sasuke! Sasuke! Get Naruto away! Get him AWAY!" Sakura was crying._

_The choking, choking, choking sound that Sakura was making caused Sasuke to grab Naruto and push him away from the edge. As he did so, he glanced down himself. And there was Iruka._

_He was lying on a ledge ten feet from where they stood._

_And there were the jagged cuts all across his uniform and the gaping hole on his side where the exploding tag had been slapped on._

_Sasuke's insides froze in shock and suddenly he was eight again and he was confused – so fucking confused. But the shock ebbed away but came back and brought with it a friend. Sasuke's body was tense with concealed horror and he turned slowly – so so slowly – towards Naruto. Naruto had seen it. Naruto had seen it all. The smile was gone and Sasuke wondered, detachedly, if the smile had been there at all. If Naruto had ever smiled before. If Naruto even knew how._

_Sasuke reached out to Naruto, to do what Sakura was doing for Kakashi. He wanted to hold him._

_His fingertips met the dry flesh of Naruto's cheeks and slid down down down and around the back of Naruto's neck and then he pulled. He pulled Naruto towards him and it was easy – too easy – and in a moment, maybe less, Naruto was against him, blue eyes staring out at nothing._

_Sasuke held him. Held him as well as he could. Held him as if trying to keep him together, to keep him from falling apart. It didn't work. But Sasuke held Naruto anyway. Even when it felt like he was holding on to the sharp shards of a broken mirror._

_

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_

_to be continued... _


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Rating: M **for explicit content**  
**

**To my Reviewers:  
KinOfDragons:** Sorry about killing him off. Lol. Erm…maybe he's not really dead? Da dad a dum. Oh. no. sorry. He is.  
**Chi no hana:** Oh…Kleenex  
**Dentai Otanashii Ookami:** Thank you so much. I'm glad that I managed to do what I had aimed for.  
**Half-demon628:** Hope this is soon enough?  
**PandaInc.:** Thank you very much!  
**Pink Jello:** lol. Angst is my middle name unfortunately…  
**Aya Kurayami:** I hope this chapter is a bit less sad? But don't hold your breath. Lol.  
**Ku**, **Phantomsnow:** Thanks!  
**Azamiko:** I suppose they just didn't _think_…  
**Smoking Panda:** Here you go!  
**Jarakuheart:** KLEENEX!  
**unheardcries: **here you go.  
**Kitty-inuyasha:** more Kleenex for you too…  
**Goingcommando:** thank you very much for the lovely review. I honestly believe Naruto's a lot deeper than we give him credit for. And losing someone who he considered a father or brother – especially when he feels he could have prevented it – would probably crush him. Once again, thank you.

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**iv.**

The fire crackled and it was the only sound that Sasuke was aware of in the brittle, broken night. His eyes reflected the orange flames and they reminded him of Naruto. Or, at least, who Naruto once was. The orange, danced bright and wild with an exuberance that licked away at the darkness around it. It danced defiantly and it whirled where it was. A whirlpool of flame that reached up and around it, warming those it got near enough to and burning those it touched.

Other nights before the Battle, Sasuke was awake, always awake, an unspoken agreement between him and his team mates that he would take the first shift at watching out for enemies. He was awake now. But so were his team mates.

As Sasuke strained his ear, he could hear Kakashi's breathing, calm and soothing over the erratic crackle of the fire.

In the swallow of the dark, Sasuke felt it. That light sizzle of intense grief that emanated not only from himself; but from his team mates in unabashed waves. He resisted the urge to reach up and grab at his chest – to stop the undiluted ache that bathed within it.

It was then that Kakashi sat up. Sasuke sat up as well, wondering if Kakashi sensed something he had not noticed yet. He fell still for a moment, before he saw the look in Kakashi's eye. Then he just nodded to the older man and watched Kakashi get up and leave, disappearing into the trees that laced their camp.

Sasuke was alone with Naruto again and in the firelight, he could see the blue eyes were damp with tears that would not go away no matter how many times Naruto cried. So they stayed there, just as they always had. Just as they always had when adults shunned him and the other children wouldn't share their toys with him. Just as they always had when he was ostracized from everyone and everything through no fault of his own.

"Naruto?" He whispered.

The name slipped off his lips easily and echoed in his head like a dream he just had and was clinging on to, or a word from a book he had read many years ago. He could hear it over and over again dancing in his mind and he hated the quivering uncertainty that stained the syllables.

"Naruto?" He whispered once more, because really, he wasn't sure he'd called out the first time.

And maybe because he sounded like he was in pain, and maybe because Naruto sensed there would be no third time – that Sasuke had bared enough – Naruto looked over at Sasuke. Naruto blinked and it was enough to let the tears flow.

And suddenly it was freezing next to that fire and even colder besides Naruto. A rough hand came to reach up for him and he relented. In a second, lips were meeting – and Sasuke wondered when kissing had become a shield to hide behind.

It was dry again, the kiss – and pulling away slightly, he found himself licking his lips and then diving in again.

A quivering tongue touched his bottom lip and there was a pause of familiar hesitation and then of remembrance that this was Naruto and this was everything. His lips parted and so did the curtains in his mind.

_Please…_

Naruto traced his teeth, his tongue and the roof of his mouth. And when he had coated Sasuke's mouth with himself, Sasuke did the same to his. He slid his tongue over Naruto's, the rush and heat hitting him forcefully and he was dizzy, dizzy, dizzy. His eyes slid open slowly to meet the slowly opening eyes of Naruto.

And for the first time, it wasn't the pain they saw in each other's eyes. It wasn't loss, hatred, bitterness, sadness…there was nothing there but a reflection of each other.

In Naruto's eyes, Sasuke saw his own: glassy with want and alive with need.

Keeping his eyes open was difficult. His eyes were being lulled closed by the quivering of Naruto's bottom lip as he sucked on it forcefully and the breath that chilled the saliva on his upper lip. He forced them open though. He wanted to see Naruto. He wanted to see himself.

He was aware now that one of his legs had forced itself between Naruto's thigh and Naruto was now pressing against him almost painfully. His lips left Naruto's and he tried to take inventory of his limbs. One arm was under Naruto, pressing him into himself and the other was somewhere between them, brushing against Naruto's hand and trying to move its way down to the waistband of his pants.

Naruto's half-lidded eyes watched as Sasuke tried to find his bearings. For a moment neither moved. The fire crackled and a slight breeze washed over them in a sleepy tide. Sasuke listened to their breathing. The hand pressed against Naruto's back twitched slightly as he fought the urge to touch the side of Naruto's face. To touch it and remember the expression it wore in that moment of stillness. The tears that had escaped had dried by now. Still, pools of them glistened in the blue depths. There was a quiet and silent surrender in the contours of Naruto's lips. And slowly, they parted.

_Yes. Please…_

The hand trapped between himself and Naruto moved now, finding Naruto's hand and lacing its fingers with Naruto's. The position was uncomfortable, both his wrist and Naruto's were bent at an odd angle. The lack of comfort was ignored by both.

A beat and Sasuke, uncomfortable with the position their hands were in but not wanting to move them, shifted his hips slightly instead.

And that was all it took.

Naruto hissed, head dropping onto Sasuke's shoulder. With his free hand, Sasuke grabbed hold of Naruto's hair, pulling his head back and exposing his neck. He shifted his hips again. This time, a groan. He watched the sound ripple out of Naruto's throat. He brushed his lips against the source of the sounds; eyelashes fluttering against Naruto's cheek. He raised his eyes up to look at Naruto's parted lips, swollen and bruised from their kiss.

_More._

Slowly, forcefully, deliberately, he moved his thigh and hip simultaneously, the friction making his breath hitch and jolts of pleasure threatened his control. Naruto's reaction threatened it farther. A moan escaped from deep within Naruto's throat and Sasuke felt it more than heard it – the heady vibration against his lips which pressed unrelentingly against Naruto's throat.

_More…_

He stilled himself, ignoring the screaming need that throbbed within him. This was too much in too little a time. He wanted to slow it down. Stretch it out. Lavish the moment against his body which was wet with perspiration. Through his clothes, he ached.

He ached.

It was Naruto who moved first now. And the ache vanished.

Sasuke exhaled sharply and untangling his fingers from Naruto's he gripped Naruto's arm just as Naruto did to him. Their grips were painful but forgotten as their hips found their rhythm and their goal made all too clear by the urgency in their kiss.

_More._

Sasuke didn't know what this was. He wanted something. Something else. Something…

_More._

He pulled at Naruto over and over again, crashing into him like a tsunami on a bay. He was panting and he felt disgusted with himself. For a moment he felt like a dog in heat. For a moment he felt dirty. But it was just a moment. And then there was--

"_More…_"

He didn't know who had said it. For a split second he thought it he had said it. For a split second–-

"_Nnngh_…Sasuke…_more_"

Naruto's forehead was on his shoulder again. Sasuke licked his lips and placed them close to Naruto's ear. He was whispering. And he wondered if Naruto could hear him. Because he hardly could hear himself.

_You're so fucking beautiful._

Naruto was squirming so hard against him now. The pressure between them building, building, building. Sasuke's world was spinning. The starbursts in his mind blinding him. And yet still:

_More_.

They were frantic now. And his forehead was slick with sweat and his lips wet with saliva. Naruto's forehead was pressed against his neck now, and his entire body throbbed. He was so so close. But still:

_More_.

Sasuke shifted and the contact between themselves intensified. Naruto groaned so loudly, Sasuke wondered who hadn't heard it. His own strangled cries were forcing themselves out of his throat; escaping in sharp hisses and exhaled gasps.

Naruto's head moved up and their breaths tickled each other's ears. Sasuke heard it all now. It was all he could hear. The gasping. The moaning. He thought he would be driven mad by it. Mad by the building. The unquenchable _need_. They were thrusting against each other now, and Sasuke wondered why they weren't getting crushed.

_More_.

Their grips on each other tightened.

Simultaneously, they both inhaled sharply.

Naruto crushed against him; grinding against him. And Naruto shuddered. As Sasuke continued to move against him, Naruto was swallowing his shouts and his screams.

A moment later, and another sharp inhalation from both and Sasuke felt his own body convulse. Suddenly, moving against Naruto became painful. He bit down hard on his lower lip trying to keep from crying aloud. Naruto's head hit his shoulder hard as he rid the last wave of his orgasm. He flinched from the pain and his hips jerked up and pleasure tore through him unrelentingly, the pain all but forgotten.

"Naruto…"

They dropped away from each other.

His eyes were closing now, and just as his eyes slid shut he could see Naruto turning away from him so he lay with his back to him. His eyes opened for a moment and for a moment more, he wanted to touch Naruto's back. Urge him to turn around so he could see him. Instead, he pulled his arm from under Naruto and turned away.

In the morning, the three were silent as they packed away their things. It took them only a few minutes to get ready to leave. They didn't need to extinguish the fire.

It had gone out itself.

* * *

_to be continued..._

_AN: My first attempt at yaoi...hope you liked? _


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